Duties of the
married state!
The
next two question is what most new born Christian man or woman tend
to ask in their desperate time of need, or when they are in despair;
concerning the affairs of their married state. What is to happen to
our partner [spouse] that don’t wish to follow us in the way of the
Lord our God? Exactly what can be done of this issue, and just who
can we turn too?
Basically,
simple, and understandable questions that do rise with most couples
who are going through the some tough times, and in, or similar type
of issues: when one is righteous and the other is of the world. Many
do contemplate and become very perplexed to the point of giving in,
or giving up: one thing for certain, we do have commandments that
tells us what we are to do, and what not to do; when in this
situation: they are there to console us and to encourage us as well
(1Co.7:10-11)And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord,
let not the wife depart from the husband: but and if she depart, let
her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not
the husband put away his wife. It also goes without saying that for
those who are weak in faith will eventually follow in the path of the
stronger spouse: to satisfy the other, or to get them off their back,
and to stop all the bickering.
When
in doubt, and things are not going the way we would rather have it
go, and it appears that the situation is eventually getting even
worse, and that it feels that we have failed some how some way: it
brings us to one of the strongest question we would have to face.
What do I do, and what can I do to please that person? This is when
disaster strikes to the point that the evil one will persist to avail
against the righteous person to return back to their sinful life as
it was before they committed themselves to God.
According
to the scriptures this is what does happen; because it is true to the
letter of the outcome of this situation, and it states this in the
Apostle Paul’s first letter to the Corinthians when he is speaking
to them of what are the duties of the married state should be
(1Co.7:33)But he that is married cares for the things that are of the
world, how he may please his wife. This of course, is one among many
reasons as to why it is very important to be a righteous person in
the presence of God: one who is committed to the Lord, and wants
nothing other than doing what is right in the sight of God: In other
words we as children of God need to be content with what we have, and
what has already been give and expect nothing more. Besides this,
lets read what the Apostle Paul tells the Corinthians concerning the
difference of, and what is between spouses on this very issue:
towards the basis of each others duty(1Co.7:12-16).
On
the other hand, this is what we are taught in the message that the
Apostle Paul spoke of concerning the duties of married couples: apart
from being content we also need to flee from any form of fornication
in order to honor our spouse, or better half if you will(1Co.7:2-5).
Its is given [marriage] to us for our pleasure: to please one
another; as we are to become as women servants, and menservants
towards one another, for the satisfaction of each others needs. What
we need to realize is that we must give to one another as what is to
be expected from one another in return: based on the foundation of
love, only God‘s true love, and not the love that is of this world.
So,
as long as we remain faithful towards one another there is no
inclination that we are doing anything wrong in the eyes of God;
seeing how He has joined us as one; when we were before twain: which
is considered Holy matrimony (Matt.19:4-6)Have ye not read, that He
which made them at the beginning made them male and female, and said.
For this cause shall man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to
his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no
more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together,
let no man put asunder.
One
thing for sure is that we must not give satan and his demons of this
world the opportunity to interfere with our relationship in any
possible way. This goes even more so to the act of fornication that
will eventually lead to adultery; and we are commanded not to do so
or to entreat one another treacherously (Mal.2:15)And did not He make
one? Yet had He the residue of the spirit. And wherefore one? That He
might seek the godly seed. Therefore take heed to your spirit, and
let none deal treacherously against the wife of his youth.
In
any case, what we need to do, is, we need to be devoted one with the
other, and to remain faithful towards one another, and yet, even more
so to our Heavenly Father. Now, one thing that is very prudent for
all to know is that if we are single, and can not contain ourselves
it is better if we are married than to burn in hell (1Co.7:9)but if
they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than
to burn. Only at the same time we need to behave in a very seemly way
that is convenient for both spouses: respectfully, faithfully, and
with unity, with devotion, and compromising everything with one
another. There is two things that need special attention in the eyes
of God: and its this, the woman must always be under submission to
her husband; if she wants everything go even better, because satan
will not have any leeway of interfering, so long as the righteous
person is doing everything right in the sight of God: this also goes
towards the righteous husband; that he needs to love his wife to
avoid any conflicts.
If
we read on, in the first letter of the Corinthians of the Apostle
Paul; we will also read what we have been discussing: everything is
written in the confines of the Holy word of God, so, lets see what
else is there to know (1Co.7:26-29). For certain, what we have read,
do read, and will continue to read is that everything that is written
in the word of God is for the benefit of the reader and hears: to
know precisely what is to be expected at any given time. For example:
within a marriage as well as within this world we are commanded to
try to live peaceably with everyone including our spouses
(Ro.12:18)If it be possible, as much as lies in you, live peaceably
with all men. If we do not do as we are commanded we will be faced
with consequences that we really don’t wish to be in
(He.12:14)Follow peace with all men, and holiness [the
sanctification], without which no man shall see the Lord.
By
all means lets not be ignorant of what is written in the glorious
word of God for instance: (2Co.7:1)Having therefore these promises,
dearly beloved, let us cleanse ourselves from all filthiness
[defilement] of the flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear
of God.
Exactly,
what can happen if we disregard what we are being commanded; should
always be in our set mind for the purpose of urgency. Along with the
encouragement; we are given consequence that will unfold soon enough,
and this can be found in (1Pe.3:7)Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with
them according to knowledge, giving honor unto the wife, as unto the
weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life;
that your prayers be not hindered. As for our wives being considered
the weaker vessel this is what the Holy Spirit thru Paul said in
reference (1Co.12:23)And those members [parts] of the body, which we
think to be less honorable, upon these we bestow more abundant honor;
and our uncomely parts have more abundant comeliness.
The
bottom line is that we men of God need to love our wives like there
is no tomorrow: lets take a good look at the reality of it: our
salvation depends on this type of love; that is the love that comes
from God (Eph.5:25)Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also
loved the church, and gave himself for it.(Col.3:19)Husbands love
your wives, and be not bitter against them. (Eph.5:28)So ought men to
love their wives as their own bodies. He that loves his wife loves
himself.
Well,
we have read some of what is in store for the state of the married
couples of the do’s and don’t as well as the what’s and what
not’s. When all has definitely failed and the marriage is nullified
because the act of fornication [adultery]; and there is no sign of
reconciliation, what needs to be done is perhaps one of the saddest
things in this world. A decree of divorcement must be filed; not only
within the laws of this world, but with the spiritual laws of God,
and this was describes by our Lord Jesus Christ in (Matt.5:31-32)It
has been said, whosoever shall put away his wife, let him give her a
writing of divorcement: but I say unto you, that whosoever shall put
away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causes her to
commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced
commits adultery.
All
I now is that we as couples must try to do the very best with
ourselves and not destroy what God has put together in holy
matrimony. Most people of this world do have the tendency of assuming
they have control of their lives: when in reality we don’t, we are
either being controlled by the Father of lights, or the father of
darkness; and they are the only two options that people of this world
have, have had, and will have for the rest of ones life. The point
that I wish to get across is that when you, we as a child of God are
dealing with a non-believer and wish not to have any dealings with
what we have, and are faced with; or what is coming from the
unbeliever that’s okay! Its all in Gods hand‘s, and we therefore
need to obey everything that is written therein for our benefit and
the benefit of the other (1Pe.3:1-2)Likewise, ye wives, be in
subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they
also may without the word be won by the conversation [behavior] of
the wives; while they behold your chaste conversation [behavior]
coupled with fear.
If
the woman and the man being righteous in the sight of God; we are,
and should not worry to much with what is going on with the other,
and not be distracted by the other for no reason at all. The demons
of this world will always try to interfere somehow, someway, and
create some form of schism between the spouses. That is why we need
to ignore what ever is being thrown at us; because we will at times
become overwhelmed by the non-believers actions, gestures, and
comments. Lets remember that we have been forewarned many times of
the consequences of being married: living by the ways of this world
(1Co.7:28)but and if thou marry, thou has not sinned; and if the
virgin marry, she has not sinned. Nevertheless such shall have
trouble [tribulation] in the flesh: but I spare you.
Among
other issues that will occur during one’s marriage we are also told
not to over do it to the point that we can loose track of what we are
doing, and eventually be in a situation we don’t wish to be: we
know that we are married, but lets not exaggerate the idea, and this
is what we are told on this point of view (1Co.7:29)but I say,
brothers, the time is short [shortened]: it remains, that [that
henceforth] both they that have wives be as though they have none.
Why,
one would ask? As I have said earlier there mustn’t be any
distraction between our relationship with God and His kingdom, and
all His righteousness. Here is some of the examples that we are given
in the since of distraction; because it is a distraction!
(1Co.7:31-35). As we know, all of what our Father expects from us, is
to obey His will not our own; as do the inhabitants of this world:
its very clear as to why we are told this. For one, lets look at what
is out there in this world of the married state: arguments, and
bickering over the stupidest things, violent domestic crimes, spouse
abusers, adulterers, hate, dehumanizing, inconsiderate of children
within the marriage, divorces, and so on.
I
truly believe that what we all need is the counseling that can only
come from the word of God, and only from the word of God. I ask, just
how is a person of this world going to help a child of God; when the
professional therapist, or counselor is of this world: there is going
to be a severe difference in beliefs between the righteous person and
that person, so, forget about that idea, and stick to true words of
encouragement. He who has ears to hear take heed to what the glorious
word of God has to say to those who are married and obey!
This
goes even more so to the children of God, for the benefit of our
salvation as well for the other. We are given many commandments that
we need to follow without prejudice, and not only selecting what we
wish to select out of deliberate actions: meaning we can not use any
of the scriptures to throw at our spouses face, because of their
inconsistency when we are just as bad in not acting in a seemly way
that is pleasurable in the sight of God.
As
I have said before, we must flee from any, and all form of
fornication; primarily, because our bodies do not belong to us
anymore. Here is one example (1Co.6:15-20). Apart from this we also
have many other things that are far more important for the married
couples to obey. So, that we can rest assure that nothing will happen
to our marriage: for instance in the book of Ephesians the Apostle
Paul tells them what exactly are the duties of wives and husbands
(Eph.5:21-33). Another example is what the Apostle Paul wrote in his
letter to Titus as to what are the Christian duties; young and old
alike, and it applies to men and women (Tit.2:1-8). As for the women
of God, they are taught how to present themselves before God
almighty. (1Ti.2:9-15).
These
passages are just a few that pertain to those who are of the married
state, and who belong to God. It is a very serious message that we
all need to listen too, obey it, and live by it. May the good Lord
bless us always, Amen!
I
hope and pray that this lesson will help you in your time of despair,
in your time of perplexity. Always remember that our Heavenly Father
is aware of what we need, but its still up to us to ask Him for help.
Our Father is grand, He is great, He is gracious, He is all about
love. I will say this that any distraction can and will pull you away
from His kingdom and righteousness, and we don’t want to do that.
Remember what Paul told the Philippians pertaining to the salvation
of God (Phil.2:12,13).